Lessons from a 45 year old.

Family is everything. Happy Birthday To Me!

On Friday I turned 45. They say that age is just a number, and I agree to some extent, but I also think you need to appreciate how much you’ve already gotten out of life and how much there still is to get. For me, both reflection and planning my future helps me live happiest, in the present moment. So as much as I hate the term “Mid-Life”, I’ll except that I’m here. And since I’m here, I’ll wear the badge of experience and knowledge. Here are just a few lessons I’ve learned…so far:

Mortality – we’ll start with this one to get it out of the way…but the older I get, as great as I feel, I understand that our time on earth is limited. It can be taken away at any time, without any notice. We need to appreciate every day we’re given. Some days are tougher than others, but every day is a gift. Tell the people in your life you love them, give your time to those who need it and find gratitude in every day.


Humbleness – it’s ok to be proud of your accomplishments, to take care of yourself, and to believe that your potential is limited by only your own thoughts and beliefs, but seriously, nobody likes an arrogant, self-absorbed, blow-hard. (haha, I love that word.)

Birthday Dinner! I’m so lucky to have these people in my life.

Your body needs to be taken care of – At 45, I may be in the best shape of my life. I am not as skinny as I was at 22, but my body is strong. This didn’t happen by chance. I work out hard 3-4 times a week. I do my best to avoid ingesting chemicals by eating a whole foods, plant based diet. I get 7-8 hours of sleep a night. If I ever get off track (and I do!), I feel it. Everything we do to our bodies and put into our bodies has an impact on our health…maybe not today or tomorrow, but eventually. Treat it right, you have just one.

Love yourself first – I am in love with the saying, “you can’t pour from an empty cup”…and I seriously believe this. If you are not happy in your life, if you are not taking care of you, how can you give to others fully? Taking care of you can be anything you feel gives you a recharge. For me its exercise, for others it may be 30 minutes by themselves sipping their favorite tea. It may be a massage, a pedicure, a shopping trip with your girlfriends…whatever it is, do it, and do it often.

My Loves.

Dreams don’t come true unless you make them – just thinking about wanting something doesn’t mean you’ll get it. Sure, it’s great to dream, to imagine greater success, more money, better relationships, a healthier body, etc…but unless you are willing to set goals, break them down into manageable bite size tasks and do the work…you will get nowhere.

Sometimes the same thing that makes you cry will later make you laugh – stomach bugs, when your dog chews your favorite shoes (or the sofa, or the wall, or your niece’s cell phone), an argument, falling in the mud, burned dinners, a flat tire in the rain. Sometimes it’s an hour later, sometimes a week, sometimes it takes years…but to find humor (or at the very least a lesson) in the “downs” of life is key.

Love isn’t always the answer – no matter how much you love someone, or they love you, there needs to be more. There needs to be mutual respect, understanding, forgiveness and communication. If any of these are missing from the equation, it may be best to walk away. This goes for friends, family and your partner.

There is no secret – happiness comes to those who chose it, whatever the circumstance.